The Internet isnt working … Again.
Call to comcast:
C: …to upgrade your service, press 2.
A: (presses 2)
C: Hi and welcome to comcast, how may I help you?
A: Hi, I was wanting to upgrade my Internet account to one that works…
C: Okay, we can definitely help you with that… (she takes my information down should we get disconnected. I want to remind her that my phone service isnt comcast, so it shouldnt be a problem. But I dont.)
It shows here that you already have an existing Internet account with us…
C: We dont have any upgrades at this time for Internet, would you like to upgrade your TV service?
A: Oh really? I was starting to wonder if maybe I accidentally bought the works half the time package.
C: (in all seriousness, she says…). No, we actually dont offer any packages like that. Currently, we dont offer anything for just half the month. According to your account, you have unlimited Internet usage. You can get on any time you want for however long you want.
A: So… I should be able to get online whenever and however long I want? Then, why does comcast keep turning it off?
C: Maybe I should transfer you to technical support instead of upgrades. They could probably help you better.
A: (I wonder about the accuracy of that statement and stifle another giggle.)
C: …..But, before I let you go, let me tell you about this great offer (speed talking starts) ifyousignuptodayforblahblahblah…
A: Im not really interested. Id really just like my Internet to work…
C: Yeah, but…
A: Transfer me.
C: Okay, well you are also eligible for our special service where we cover all technical equipment and it gives you 24/7 access to a technician in case you have more problems… Its only $9.99 a month.
A: No thanks.
C: Well, I thought you might be interested since youre having so much trouble. The technician could login to your computer remotely and help you get back online. And, itd all be free.
A: You mean… After the $9.99 a month, itd be free?
C: Thats correct.
A: So, let me get this straight: You want me to double-pay for Internet service I should be getting anyway but Comcast keeps screwing up. And then, you want your goofy technicians to have access to remote-in to my private computer from wherever to do absolutely nothing because lets face it… My Internet problems? Its not me, its you people.
C: Er…um…but…Well, okay. You are also eligible for a free home security system, but I will just have someone call you back about that so I can go ahead and transfer you to technical support to get your Internet back up.