Posts Filed Under The way I roll

For Today, July 3, 2014

by bosssanders on July 3, 2014 with 1 comment

Say “Hello” to Super Little Red Princess No-Eyes!

Outside my window…
It’s a sun-shiney day!

I am thinking…

about date ideas!

Last week, we did this:

We headed to a studio to paint…

We both chose “Parisian” themes…  and set to work…

It was hubby’s first time EVER to paint.  He did a great job!  –And, we both had a lot of fun!

Last night, we had an impromptu date night… created a new recipe that ended like this:

It was… YUMMY!  No idea what I’m going to call it in my recipe journal… but, it’s definitely a new favorite with the whole family.

Then, we put the munchkins to bed… and the MR. and I watched funny youtube videos.  We laughed so hard and until our sides hurt.  It was a great and easy “date” for the week (no sitter needed!  And, FREE!)  If you want to watch some of our favorites, go HERE.

This weekend is HIS turn to plan a date, so I’m pretty curious to see what he chooses!

I am thankful…

118.  Fireworks – bright colors bursting on black
119.  Sweet smiles
120.  Being serenaded by the littlest…

“Momma, what song me sing for you?” – AJ

121.  My lovely husband
122.  $1 movies and pool with friends!
123.  A good book and cuddly blanket
124.  Sweet neighbors
125.  Naptime (Oh, praise Jesus for naptime!)
126.  Golden fields and rainbows
127.  Side-splitting laughter
128.  My little brother
129.  Story-telling with my sweet Grams
130.  Singing praises to Jesus at church with the doors open wide
131.  Fresh flowers on my table from a friend…

132.  A Summer Bath

In the kitchen

We’ve tried two new dishes this week, so that’s been fun!  Both were very well-liked!  Tonight is smothered beef and bean burritos per hubs request.  (Also, he’s cooking it.  Ha!  It’s the only way he can ensure it doesn’t have veggies in it.)

I am reading…


And…still this:  I’ve been writing more than I’ve been reading, lately.  I’ve started writing over at and a few things over at (it’s not spiffy-looking yet, but I needed to get thoughts out of my head, so…there it is.)

We/I am learning…

This week, we’ve focused more on life than schoolwork :)   Concentrated on hearts and little spirits.  HOWEVER, we have made a major switch in curriculum for the first graders… we are swapping out hooked on phonics first grade and doing MFW first-grade reading program, instead.  It’s working MUCH better for us!  (The kindergarten HOP was GREAT, but we needed a new direction after we finished it up!)

Around the house…

This week has involved lots of cleaning!  Monday is our cleaning day, anyhow… so, we cleaned cleaned cleaned.  Tuesday, we had a fun day with friends, then came home and cleaned a little more.  Wednesday, we went to my parents’ house and cleaned together for a little while as a surprise gift.  I don’t know why my house isn’t sparkling by now!?

Favorite Things and Moments…

Dresses made by Mimi… and the sweet sisters in them…

Another one…

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How to die while shaving – an almost-complete tutorial

by bosssanders on June 19, 2014 with no comments

Except not.

Because I would never advise such an unfortunate ending.

At least die while saving babies from crocodiles on skis made of piranhas.  I mean, really.

Seriously, though.   A while back, I saw this fabulous pin for shaving with baby oil gel.  It’ll make your skin so soft, they said.  You won’t have to shave again for days, they said.  It’ll keep your razor sharp, they said.
Not having to shave for days?  Soft skin?  Less money spent on my man-razors made necessary by the jungle undergrowth that are my legs?  Why, of course!  Sign me up!
Do you know what happens when baby oil meets shower?  Slicker than snot death trap, that’s what.  But, because I belong in a circus for my weird and random feats, I was able to shave while standing on one leg in my self-made ice rink of baby oil without dying.

Death does not like to be defied, people.

A couple of swipes with the razor and it was filled with oil-gel…and hair.  Like, a permanent fixture, refusing to move, a gunky testament to my stupidity.  Clearly, this razor wasn’t lasting longer due to the oil UNLESS what they meant to say was that it keeps your razor sharp by gunking it up so you only get 2 swipes into your shave.

Thank you so very much.
And because that’s not bad enough, then your husband gets in the shower and is all, “why am I sliding in the shower?”  And, you just shrug and are all like, “No idea. And I know nothing about your razor in there either. “

For Today, June 17, 2014

by bosssanders on June 17, 2014 with no comments

“Mom, I just don’t know how to listen to you, sometimes.”  You’ve made that very clear, dear…now, get out of the sandbox.

Outside my window…

It is warm and we are back home (YAY!)  Today, we had some soapy water play… one of the kids’ FAVORITES!  Next time, I’ll put them all in bathing suits and we’ll call it a BATH!  I love multi-tasking!

I am thinking…
That life is an adventure.

A friend of mine recently remarked that she wishes that she could live with us because we have so many adventures.  And, it’s true… but, the truth is… we all have adventures.  This life…it’s an adventure.  Some adventures are less fun, but they are still adventures!

We’ve lived some pretty crazy extremes… we’ve had years where we didn’t know how we were going to buy food for the next week and adventures where we were blessed to go on a couple of trips in one year.  We’ve had adventures where we’ve seen amazing love and terrifying hate.  We’ve seen life, we’ve seen death.  We’ve been built up, we’ve been stretched thin.  We’ve had adventures where we have brought new life in the world while separated by oceans (deployment).

Life seems so much more amazing when we look through the lens that EVERYTHING is an adventure.  There is beauty in the mundane and the hard, too…if we’ll just look hard enough.

This last week, we were invited to tag along with hubby for a business trip.

There was a mix-up on the hotel room.

6 people.  1 week.  This.  (This is the WHOLE room.)

I will admit.  I didn’t feel particularly adventurous after a whole day in the car and THIS being the room we walk into (after expecting a suite).  In fact, I walked straight into the closet to cry.  And then, after the front desk told us that nothing else was available, I begged to go home or buy duck tape and anti-anxiety meds for the week.

There wasn’t even room for pallets on the floor for everyone.

But then, the hotel changed it’s mind and gave us a room with 2 small doubles.  It wasn’t perfect, but we could work with it!

Then, this:

Turns out, limos are cheaper than cabs for big parties.  So, we rode in style for a week!

We browsed the American Girl store and got a quick treat.  Then, we went to the lego store to play with legos :)

We stayed up past our bedtimes and had slap-happy laughter…

We ate chicago-stuffed-pizza and…

were photo-bombed by a zombie.

Mommy was TIRED and WORN OUT, but there was fun to be had!

So, we went to the zoo…

and had our faces painted… (and, if you squint, it almost looks professional and worth the $16 each)

We went to the park, (girls) learned to sew, and…

went on a death-defying ferris wheel.

Then, mommy came home and slept for 2 days.

I am thankful…
85.  For chocolate coffee
86.  Little bubbles, flying
87.  A husband who is willing to wake up at 6 am to mow the yard
88.  …and, go to the grocery at 9 pm
89.  …and feed the kids supper because I was too nauseous to eat what I had fixed
90.  To the sounds of the littles and their daddy practicing their “crazy” laughs
91.  Watching littles break into dance on dance floors at weddings
92.  lego creations
93.  Excitement on little faces as they learn new things
94.  The smell of honeysuckle
95.  For a husband who defends me and has my back
96.  For love-letters from my darling La
97.  Sweet tears from La because she just can’t stand being away from me, sometimes (because she is just overwhelmed by love)
98.  For nightly “dates” with my hubby, watching our favorite shows all snuggled up
99.  fireflies – little orbs of light dancing all around
100.  The sweet fragrance of honeysuckle floating on balmy breeze
101.  Warm concrete, cool grass
102.  Sunflowers, outstretched petals
103.  Refreshing rainshowers
104.  Clover – white polka dots on blankets of green
105.  Clear blue skies
106.  Colors, crisp and bright
107.  Swinging high, legs pumping, wind through my hair
108.  Relaxing in the hammock with a good book
109.  Star-gazing
110.  The windchime’s song
111.  Butterfly waltz
112.  The joyous sound of the ice cream truck coming around the block
113.  Running through sprinklers
114.  Fellowship with friends
115.  Walking on the beach
116.  S’mores over campfire
117.  Farmers Market

In the kitchen…

Mini quiche from yesterday (see FB page for easy recipe HERE!)  <— be sure to like our FB page for fun updates and funnies.
Tonight, we are having chicken pot pie (recipe HERE)

I am reading…

I’ve been writing more than I’ve been reading, lately.  I’ve started writing over at and a few things over at (it’s not spiffy-looking yet, but I needed to get thoughts out of my head, so…there it is.)

We/I am learning…

This week is our first week (officially) of school.  We school year-round, which enables us to take breaks as needed.  Plus, we don’t go backwards on any of our learning.  Technically, though, the kids have been working on math and random learning-stuff even on their break through May and half of June.

Currently, we are learning about the RAINFOREST (one of my favorites!) and South America.  The big 3 have all selected 2 animals and a plant from the rainforest and will be researching them and giving a short presentation as to what makes them special.  They are SUPER excited!  Of course, Ro chose the flower that eats things.  :)

Also, we accidentally killed our venus fly trap babies.  Well, technically… they were seeds.  And, they took too long to grow.  There are a couple of tiny shoots, now, but keeping the lid on (as instructed) created more of a mold emporium than greenhouse since the seeds took FOREVER.  So, if you know of a great place to buy a venus fly trap that is actually a decent size… let me know.

Around the house…

Today, I cleaned out the fridge.  Penicillin, anyone?

Oh, also unpacked, cleaned out the microwave, and wiped down the cabinet doors.  Nothing creative in the works right now.  Just trying to get back to “normal.”

A favorite quote…

“Mom, I like you more than a cat.” –La

Um, thanks?


The Mean Mommy And Her No-Pet Rule

by bosssanders on May 29, 2014 with 1 comment

La has been begging for a pet, lately.  And, when I say lately, I mean like… every day for the past six months.

We don’t have anything against pets (we have had them in the past), it’s just “not where we are right now.”  And, by “not where we are right now,” I mean, having an uninsured, shedding individual with an insatiable appetite for non-edible things just doesn’t appeal to me at this moment in life.  Nor do pee-soaked carpets or big turd clusters in our tiny yard.  Okay, actually, I’m assuming the dog would be uninsured, but I’ve actually not checked Obama Care.  I’m sure it only applies to people, but you never know with that guy.

I accidentally shared this tid-bit with another mom – thinking there would be some sort of “Mothers Unite” and a high-five or something, but instead she looked at me like I had said that I hate puppies and kittens.  And, that’s just not it.

Actually, I really like and enjoy animals.  There’s nothing like cuddling a sweet cat or dog and burying your face into their soft fur…that is, until your eyelids begin to swell shut and your throat itches so badly that swallowing giant pieces of a cracker seems worth the risk of choking if only it will SCRATCH. THE. ITCH.  A bit of a fuzzbuzz-kill on the whole thing, really.

So, I explained that five out of six of us had pet allergies and not much space in our small yard…or, house, for that matter.  Not to mention, we’re just trying to simplify our lives by not adding more things that require constant upkeep (beyond the children and husband, of course).

You see, I already wipe several butts more often than I care to admit.  I single-handedly save children from choking, dangerous jumping, mauling each other, and forest fires on a daily basis.  I keep the peace, prevent children from dissecting power outlets with butter-knives, toasting their hands in the toaster-oven, and keep the house from burning down.  I feel pretty accomplished at the end of the day when we’re all mostly alive and the walls are still standing.  (I may not be standing, but WE. STILL. HAVE. WALLS! )  That, right there, is a success in my book.  And, nothing you say will change my mind.  Add in some Pinterest fun, children dressed, and supper on the table and I feel like SUPER MOM!

You know, we actually DID try fish.  They were lots of fun.  There was a little disappointment when La realized that they wouldn’t come to the surface when she sang like the animals do in Snow White.  I tried to explain it to her, but all she went away with was that maybe they’re deaf.  Or, dumb.  I think that talk went well, don’t you?

Unfortunately, fish don’t respond well to cuddling and we had to break it to her that the fish weren’t actually learning the complicated swimming technique of floating – they were just kinda dead.  Of course, we had a very special funeral with “last words” and flushing…and, of course, that special photographic moment where she posed with her dead fishies as she looked down at them ever so morosely.  That one’s a keepsake photo for the scrapbook, for sure.

After relating our position on pets (for now) to the other mother…

*Blank Stare.*

And then she gave me that look that said: “But, you want more kids?”

And, I just know that’s what she was thinking because I’m a gifted mind-reader and all.

So, I thought right back at her…  “Touché lady.  Although, I’m not sure how that actually applies, seeing as how we’ve never really had an issue with our babies eating our shoes or dropping dirties in the neighbors’ yards,  so we do have that.

But, I’m not sure she even heard me because not everyone can be mind-readers, like me.  It’s a super-special gift, like that.

***Note: We totally like other people’s pets except for the ones we don’t.  Sometimes, La shrieks, which is hilarious because she’s so adamant about wanting a dog.  So, I’m beginning to think she’s trying reverse-psychology…except, I don’t think she even knows what that is.


For Today, Tuesday, September 24, 2013

by bosssanders on September 24, 2013 with no comments

Outside my window…

Fall is here!

I am thinking…

Adoption, in all of it’s BEAUTY… has hard stuff, too.  I mean, that’s how we got here in the first place, right?  Unimaginable loss.  Broken hearts.  So much pain.  It’s so easy to focus on the beautiful side; it’s the side we want to soak up.  I’ve been thinking lately about our little boy and the HURT.  Physically, emotionally, spiritually…all of it.  I can’t imagine watching people who traveled with your parents coming back… but not with your parents.  And you wait.  Day in and day out.  I wonder if he thinks we left him, too.  And, my heart hurts for him.  I feel so inadequate, like I’m facing this huge giant.  How on earth can I heal these deep wounds of this precious little boy? I think to myself.

Then, today, as I’m reading to the girls about a little girl named Sarah Whitcher, God speaks to me through the story.  This couple loses their little girl in the wilderness (back in the pioneer days when there were no dog teams and helicopters and phones and amber alerts).  And, the father keeps saying: The Lord is with us.  I smile, pushing back tears, because I know this message is just as much for me.  He is with us.

It’s not up to me to heal my sweet boy.  In fact, I AM inadequate… But, HE is not!

God won’t give me what HE can’t handle!

I am thankful…

14.  For cool beginnings of fall.
15.  For a momma who listens to my heart and scoops me up with encouragement.
16.  For words of encouragement from friends who have “been there, done that,” reminding me that God is still sovereign and even this doesn’t surprise Him.
17.  For insight into my little boy’s life.

In the Kitchen…

Chicken Pot Pie with homemade crust and all!  YUM!

I am creating…

I am going…
To a meeting…

I am reading…

I just finished Little House on the Freeway by Dr. Tim Kimmel (buy it here).  If you find yourself BUSY BUSY BUSY and SO STRESSED… this is the book for you.  In his book, Dr. Kimmel helps hurried families find the peace they are looking for with some very real and specific advice.  It’s so easy to wish for the days when things were slow and unhurried, and while we can’t blast back in time, we CAN create homes and lives that are peaceful and productive –YES, EVEN TODAY!  We don’t even have to move to an island or give up all technology!  (Hooray for that!)  We have incorporated many of his thoughts and lessons into our lives and enjoy the time we are able to spend with our family and friends and the peace that brings.  Great book!

I am listening…

I am hoping…
To hear good news regarding our little boy’s paperwork soon…still hoping…

I am looking forward to…

My house being organized and finally putting some finishing touches in the rooms!  And, our boy being home!  COME ON ALREADY!

We/I am learning…
This week, the girls will be learning about George Washington!  Our oldest daughter is learning to add larger numbers (2 digits, no carrying) and about King David’s household.  Our younger daughter is practicing counting 14-20 and is learning the same science and history as our eldest.  Our little guy is learning NOT to climb to the top bunk.  :)

Around the house…
I’m considering ideas for our living room (above our couch)…for a photo collage

A favorite quote…

One of my favorite things…

A necklace that my friend, Shannon, gave me for my birthday with “Proverbs 3:5-6 ” carved into the back.  Such a great reminder!


For Today, Friday, September 20, 2013

by bosssanders on September 20, 2013 with 2 comments

Outside my window…

Wind-chimes tinkle in the rain.

I am thinking…

(So, so true… and hard!)

I am thankful…

1.  A God who loves us so much – more than we can ever imagine.
2.  He loves us so much, He gave up His ONLY Son, to be beaten and killed on a cross for a bunch of people who could never deserve it or appreciate.  I can’t imagine giving up one of my kids like that.  And yet, He did it for me… for you.
3.  That I can go to my God to pray anytime, anywhere.  I don’t have to wait for the yearly sacrifice in the temple.  No pigeons, no goats.  Just me and God.
4.  For my husband, he’s my very own “David” (man after God’s own heart).  So thankful for the ways he’s grown and continues to search out God.
5.  My kids – they are amazing.  All 4 of them.  They make me laugh and smile and man… I have awesome kids!
6.  My family and friends.  From my parents to my in-laws to my aunts/uncles/cousins and friends (family who chose us)… They are a part of our net.  They catch us when we fall and encourage us.  They shout with joy with us in triumphs and battles won.  These people are amazing.
7.  My church and church family (which includes all of my brothers and sisters in Christ)…
8.  My home and all of our “necessities.”  Not everyone has running water out of several faucets, toilets, hoses, washer, etc.  Not everyone has clean water.  Not everyone has warm/cool place to sleep.  Or electricity.  Or food.  We say they’re “necessities”… but really, they’re ALL luxuries.
9.  My past.  My hurts.  They’ve shaped us.  Made us more humble, more understanding, more grace-filled, more merciful, more loving, more honest, more caring… They’ve brought us to where the only place to look was UP… to Him…
10.  For the pitter-patter of little feet, running through the house.
11.  Little crazy-haired babes sneaking into bed with us for cuddles.
12.  For little not-quite-two-year-old boys who say “Yes ma’am” with no prompting.
13.  Tea-time with peppermint tea and chocolate chip cookies with my girls before naptime.

In the Kitchen…

KY Derby Pie…
Chocolate chip cookies…
And plans for chili (with noodles) for supper.

I am creating…
Pillow-covers.  I was trying the “tied” no-sew pillow covers, but turns out the fabric I bought is a little too thick.  So, looks like I’ll be using my not-yet-used-serger (from many birthdays ago… back before I hit my sewing dry-spell… somewhere around the time my hubby left for Iraq and I was pregnant and caring for 2 littles.  It’s not like I’ve been busy or anything!)

Also, a recipe e-book.  Stay tuned!

I am going…
Absolutely nowhere today.  And I love it.  Yay for rest today!

I am reading…

Wise Words for Moms (and dads!) by Ginger Plowman.  I really really like her teaching on parenting and disciplining kids.  Her flip-book (only $3.99!) is GREAT for a quick-glance on how to get to the heart of issues.  She lists out different topics (whining, disobeying, etc) and then gives heart-probing questions, scripture to explore with your kiddos on why it’s something we don’t do and then examples to help build them back up.  It’s easy to treat the surface issue, but this is great for tackling the heart issue!  Plus, in the throes of parenting, when you have supper burning, one baby crying on your hip and two in the middle of a throw-down… it’s easy, consistent, go-to advice and keeps you from simply screaming STOP!  EVERYONE’S IN TIMEOUT!  ME FIRST!  I’m adding it to my Favorite Resources List… every parent/grandparent needs one!

I’ve just started this one, but am super excited to read more!  (buy it here)

I am listening…

In her audio cd set, Reaching The Heart Of Your Child, Ginger Plowman takes the Wise Words For Moms booklet and really breaks it down.  She gives GREAT insight on how to effectively teach your children from the core, not just teaching them not to (insert thing here).  For example, she teaches us how to teach our kids about KINDNESS or RESPECT… not just “don’t hit,” “don’t kick,” don’t throw a marshmallow at Lucy’s head,” etc.  If we simply focus on the outward behaviors, our very creative children will consistently come up with new ones.  However, if we arm them with deep lessons and scripture, they will eventually be able to catch themselves in the act and be able to stop themselves AND take these lessons into adulthood.  Ginger takes time to explain WHY we must speak to our kids’ hearts instead of simply telling them no, swat, and go.  Another FAVORITE RESOURCE!!

This CD by IHOP is GREAT.  It’s one of those that we crank up during difficult times to turn our weeping into dancing!  Click here to listen

I am hoping…
To hear good news regarding our little boy’s paperwork soon…

I am looking forward to…
the weekend!  And being able to spend it with hubby, our kids, and family and friends!

We/I am learning…
The kids just completed their FIRST QUARTER in school!  They both received ALL A’s!  Woohoo!  We are so excited for them!
Currently, they are learning about early pioneers and manners.  Big sister is specifically learning on grouping and adding larger numbers and working within tens and ones places.  She is also learning about King David and King Solomon and practicing being courageous.   Little sister is learning about creation and beginning to count our way towards 100 (we are to 14, now) and beginning grouping.  Little brother seems like he’s wanting to potty train.  Mommy, on the other hand, not so much.

Around the house…
We’ve been in this house for around a year, give or take.  Now that we know it pretty well and have mostly figured out what we need each room to be/do… we’re ready to take a more pro-active stance on decorating.  I’m a cautious decorator when it comes to my own home.  I don’t like junk.  I don’t like lots of excess.  And, because of the size of the space we live in, I’m all about multi-functional (yet cost-effective) items.  Harder to come by.  (Feel free to throw in ideas.)

First up…  Our living room.

The first order of business is I need two sets of shelving or small bookcases of some sort that can hold our homeschool materials that we are actively using at a given time.  But, I want to be able to keep it organized and PRETTY… but oh-so-functional.  The space between the couches isn’t a lot, so I need something awesome.  I’m not sure about how I want to pull this one off.

Also, I’m re-covering the ugly pillows that came with the couch.  U-G-L-Y.

Next, I really wanted to put a photo collage behind our couch… but, I haven’t found any ideas so far that don’t look crazy cluttered or just… ugly.  I love the idea of using different elements to make it look really neat.

Then, I have a few more ideas for a couple of other small touches.  Oh, and the mantle… needs some fall decorations…  All in my head, but not really TOP priority compared to getting our boy home.

A favorite quote…

One of my favorite things…

We are collecting tea cups!



by bosssanders on July 7, 2012 with 1 comment

I woke up bright and early, thinking we could tackle the overgrown bushes (which look a lot like they grew tentacles in the past couple of weeks).  Unfortunately, my husband disagreed by not waking up.  So, I set out to take down the foilage myself.  I mean, really?  How hard could it be?

Apparently, not hard at all.

These hedge trimmers can cut through ANYTHING!!!

I was pretty excited and was all, “I’m a ROCKSTAR!!”

And then it died… That’s when I realized it really can cut through anything.

Not to be dissuaded, I ran inside and found some tape (which comes only second to a band-aid in making “everything better”).

Suddenly, I had POWERRRR again!  Yeh!

I sliced through the jungle in front of my house, taking down shrubbery with vengeance!  No MERCY for you, you leafy green growth!  Bahaha!  I was kind of getting into the karate chopping-like motions I’d seen others do with my Powerrrrr!



Sometimes I guess too much power can lead to none at all.

(Wow, that sounded deep.)

Apparently, I am no longer allowed to operate power tools and trim hedges (Steven thinks it looks more like they were massacred rather than trimmed.)

I’m surprisingly not very sad about this.

filed under The way I roll

Weird Like That

by bosssanders on September 7, 2011 with no comments


Silly Comcast

by bosssanders on July 30, 2011 with 3 comments

The Internet isnt working … Again.

Call to comcast:

C: …to upgrade your service, press 2.

A: (presses 2)

C: Hi and welcome to comcast, how may I help you?

A: Hi, I was wanting to upgrade my Internet account to one that works…

C: Okay, we can definitely help you with that… (she takes my information down should we get disconnected. I want to remind her that my phone service isnt comcast, so it shouldnt be a problem. But I dont.)

It shows here that you already have an existing Internet account with us…

A: Precisely.

C: We dont have any upgrades at this time for Internet, would you like to upgrade your TV service?

A: Oh really? I was starting to wonder if maybe I accidentally bought the works half the time package.

C: (in all seriousness, she says…). No, we actually dont offer any packages like that. Currently, we dont offer anything for just half the month. According to your account, you have unlimited Internet usage. You can get on any time you want for however long you want.

A: Exactly.

C: What?

A: So… I should be able to get online whenever and however long I want? Then, why does comcast keep turning it off?

C: Maybe I should transfer you to technical support instead of upgrades. They could probably help you better.

A: (I wonder about the accuracy of that statement and stifle another giggle.)

C: …..But, before I let you go, let me tell you about this great offer (speed talking starts) ifyousignuptodayforblahblahblah…

A: Im not really interested. Id really just like my Internet to work…

C: Yeah, but…

A: Transfer me.

C: Okay, well you are also eligible for our special service where we cover all technical equipment and it gives you 24/7 access to a technician in case you have more problems… Its only $9.99 a month.

A: No thanks.

C: Well, I thought you might be interested since youre having so much trouble. The technician could login to your computer remotely and help you get back online. And, itd all be free.

A: You mean… After the $9.99 a month, itd be free?

C: Thats correct.

A: So, let me get this straight: You want me to double-pay for Internet service I should be getting anyway but Comcast keeps screwing up. And then, you want your goofy technicians to have access to remote-in to my private computer from wherever to do absolutely nothing because lets face it… My Internet problems? Its not me, its you people.

C: Er…um…but…Well, okay. You are also eligible for a free home security system, but I will just have someone call you back about that so I can go ahead and transfer you to technical support to get your Internet back up.

filed under Reviews, The way I roll

Reaching Out

by bosssanders on July 2, 2011 with 3 comments

There is this thing about (most) military wives – they don’t like to ask for help.

To many, it’s thought of as a character defect – as something they just need to learn to get over and “do.”

But, the truth is:  It’s what we’re taught to do.  We’re taught to stand brave and proud behind our men.  We’re taught that a good military wife is courageous, patient, resourceful, and when duty calls…self-reliant.  We’re taught from the inside, but more than that, it’s the outside world that teaches military wives these things.

Sometimes it’s easy to forget some of the things still being fought for when it’s not blaring at us from the news and it’s no longer front-page headlines.  It’s easy for communities to forget the sacrifices that many men, women, and children make when someone serves, especially in cities removed from military posts or bases.  But, forgetting doesn’t make the reality fade away.

A short time ago, I was having dinner with a friend as she related some of her struggles as a military wife to me.  Her husband was called up, leaving her pregnant and what felt like a million years away from him.  She didn’t live near post, and it didn’t take long for the emotions and daily tasks to become overwhelming without him there.  And too soon, the community and church that had vowed to watch over that military service member’s family…was mostly forgotten.  She was left mostly alone to deal with it all in a dark corner on her couch.

As she related parts of her story to me, I couldn’t help but feel disgusted.  I couldn’t believe people would just forget her.  I couldn’t believe I was one of those people.

You see, I hadn’t really connected with this special woman before, but I did know OF her.  I knew her husband was leaving.  I knew she was pregnant.  But, that was about it.  I could try to wash it away now with excuses:

Had I known she was hurting, I would have…

She never told me…

She never asked me for…

I thought others would step up… where were her friends?…

But, you know what the truth is?  Excuses…it’s all they are.  I didn’t know she was hurting because *I* didn’t call to find out.  I didn’t know how many people had virtually stepped off the grid because I wasn’t there to find out.

I learned the reality and frequency of happenings such as these when my husband had only just left for the first stage in his deployment.  It began as a kind question from a woman, “How are you doing?”  I smiled, forcing tears back as I told her he’d recently left.  “Ah, well…you’ll get over it.”  She said, “After all, you knew it would happen at some time or another.”

My heart froze, my face along with it.  And, in that moment (and many more to come), I finally realized something:  Not reaching out and asking for help is sometimes not a defect at all, but rather a learned response after having it all shoved back into their faces, time and time again.

I understand how easy it is to forget the families that serve.  I know that sometimes we believe they are doing just fine, and sometimes…we don’t even know how to help.  I know schedules are busy and overloaded and pockets run near empty sometimes.  But, I hope you choose to remember anyways.

To all of the men and women who have given up their lives for our country – MY FREEDOM – thank you.

To all of the men and women that have served and still serve.  To those of you who have given up not only being able to see your family and air-conditioning and good food, but also sometimes sacrificing an arm or leg (or more) — THANK YOU.

To the families, who go day in day out, serving their country quietly (or not-so-quietly).  To those of you who give up bedtime kisses and time with your loved ones.  To the wives who play the roles of both mommy and daddy, endure long days and longer nights, and comfort their crying babies when they want to be held themselves.  –THANK YOU.

To the brave children who stand behind their mommies and daddies as they do their jobs far away.  To the little tear-stained cheeks who trade Hershey kisses for mommy/daddy’s kisses as they wait for them to come home…  THANK YOU too  (You are a whole other brand of heroes to me!)

To the communities who diligently watch out for these families and soldiers, who do more than talk about supporting and loving and actually DO SOMETHING.  To the people who make it their mission not to let soldiers or their families fall through the cracks.  — THANK YOU

We live in a country that claims to be PROUD of our heritage and our men and women who got us here, but I pray that we become a country that is more ACTION than TALK – and that someday soon, someone’s service to this country and the sacrifice it involves will no longer be viewed as their problem/their choice but rather a community’s  blessing and chance to serve and be supportive.

I pray that each and every one of you have a happy and wonderful FOURTH OF JULY weekend – and if you haven’t already, that you’ll invite a soldier and their family, deployed family, veteran, or widow to your own festivities.

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