While the rest of the world was raising their champagne glasses, I was gulping elderberry.

And, as the rest of the world celebrated like this:

Our celebration resembled that horrific scene in Little House On The Prairie where everyone was unconscious and only woke occasionally to shout weird stuff in their sleep with bloody noses and fevers and achey bodies. Okay, maybe that’s not EXACTLY how it went (in the movie)…

But seriously, I’m done with this junk. (Now, if it’d be so kind to be done with us!)

Despite feeling hungover (and having had absolutely no alcohol), I’m excited about a new year, a new day.

In 2012…

- Steven had just come home from Iraq and meeting his son

- we bought a house!

- Lala started public school

- Steven got a raise

- We felt God telling us that NOW was the time to begin the process of adopting.

- We began the adventure of adoption!

- the kids were sick for about 3 months straight

- Santa left the building

- Lala began homeschool

Each year, I look back over goals as I evaluate some that I’ve missed (or need to throw out altogether) and things I’d like to improve upon. My goals aren’t a last ditch effort to write something down as a part of a holiday tradition, but they are things that come to me months prior and i collect a list.

In the past 2 years, I’ve chosen a word to focus on, something I prayerfully consider to keep me focused on something I really need to work on. A central theme to it all, if you will.

2011: Grace
2012: Patience

And, this year? My word is

DEEPER

I want to be more intentional when it comes to my family and my marriage and how we incorporate God. I want more intentional prayer TOGETHER – both with my husband and as a family.

I want to dive deeper with my children in their faith – I want to establish new traditions and just… go deeper.

I want to love deeper. I want to love God deeper. And in turn, I want to love His people deeper – the hurting, the needy, the hard-to-love.

i want to dive deeper in nourishing my family. I want to learn new techniques and recipes and become comfortable with them (instead of resembling an episode off I Love Lucy!)

I want to go deeper in my home. Organization.

I want to live deeper… In America, we strive towards the “American Dream” and yet Jesus asks us to live at the bottom. I don’t particularly want to be starving, but I want to strip off any lingering thoughts of privilege and live in a simpler way that allows us to bless others with our excess. I want to stretch wider and deeper. I want to redefine our own American Dream. I want to take the shoes on my feet up to the altar for the homeless. I want to share my meals with the hungry. I want to cry with the hurting. I want to love the hard-to-love. I want to clothe those who need it. I want to go deep.

I want deeper relationships. Facebook is a great TOOL. But, it doesn’t take the place of spending time with people and real conversations. I don’t necessarily lack friends, per se. But, I want to rely less on online tools and more on breaking bread together, serving together, spending time together.

I want deeper investments in my children…including their learning. Their lives… all of it.