The Anti-Fundraising Rant

by bosssanders on July 13, 2012 with 5 comments

“Why are you asking me for money to add on to your family – I didn’t ask you for money when we decided to conceive.”

“You chose this, you should deal with it.”

“Did you not know going in how much this would cost?”

“I just don’t understand why you are doing this… It’s one thing for people who HAVE the money, but…”

Okay, stop.

I’m surprised…I really am.  Not to hear this, but who it’s coming from.

So, let’s talk, shall we?

In the bible, it says:

Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you.  -James 1:27

Over and over, we are CALLED to help the widows and orphans.  Each. and. every. one. of. us.

However, although we are all called to help and serve, we are not all called to adopt.  Some are called to orphan care (pleading for their cause, raising money), some are called to help support other families bring home orphans, etc.

For us, the call was adoption.  I mentioned HERE how we have tried to outrun the call…ignore it.  –Not because we don’t love His children, but because we wanted to do our own things on our own time and the way we wanted to do them!  (Turns out, you can’t outrun God!)

The reason we have chosen to adopt is because God called us to.

I am an analytical-minded girl.  I live off of pie charts and spreadsheets – so, did the “money” factor ever come up in my head?  You bet it did.  And, then I am reminded that God called us to this, so He will provide the resources to make it happen.

This is not about Ashley and Steven simply wanting to add a 6th placemat to the table. –If it were, I can honestly think of an easier (for me) way.  One where I can have a little more of the control I crave in my life, one where we aren’t asked to step out with great faith (another hard one for me!), and one that requires a lot less humbling of ourselves.

We aren’t asking for money to expand our family.

We are giving the opportunity to others to help give a hurting, lonely child a forever home.  We are EXCITED (and a little terrified of the process) to have the opportunity to be BLESSED by the child God will bring us.  –And, we’d love to share in this journey with others as they pray about what God is calling them to do.

True, the fundraising is intimidating (for us, too) – but, when we remember that our REASON is His sweet child…it just changes the whole world for us.

And, just to level with you… I hate asking for money.  I don’t like feeling dependent on others.  I like to be the one giving.  This is not easy for me.  But, that’s okay… I’m willing to go out of my comfort zone…because this is IMPORTANT.  Because this is about a CHILD.  And that, I can’t ignore.

On the flip-side, as we work hard to fund-raise, we aren’t collecting other people’s money as we splurge our own money on big fancy vacations and lots of eating out and entertainment and grown up toys.  We have committed ourselves to this wonderful thing.

But, we can’t do it alone.

We depend on God and we depend on His people to answer what He’s calling them to do.  $10, $20, $50… it seems like a little, but it can go a LONG way if a lot of people just did a little.  If 3,000 people each gave $10, we’d be there!  Or, could you imagine if 1,500 people each gave $20?  Or… 1,000 people gave $30 each?  Or… 300 people gave $100!!

When you break it down, it’s amazing what each of us can do to change the lives of others…

If every single person who read this blog donated $10-$20… we could change a child’s life TOGETHER and FOREVER.

So, I’m inviting you on this journey with us.

We are so grateful to share the love that we have with someone who needs to be loved. We know that raising a child isn’t easy and the adoption process can add its own unique challenges. We have already made sacrifices and are committed to continuing to sacrifice whatever is necessary to give our son the love that he needs and deserves.

We need your help! You, our friends and family, are the ones who can support us and encourage us in this journey. More than that you can help us overcome the financial hurdle that currently stands between us and our son.

Would you generously share your resources so that we can share our love?

If you would like to donate, you can click on the paypal button at the top-right of the blog that says “donate” – it’s secure, fast, and easy.  Your information will NOT be stored.

And, if you’d like to donate services, products, etc to to be auctioned off — or, if you’d like to help in any other way… God bless you!

Of course, we always covet your prayers…


The Sanders

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filed under Adoption


  • Stephanie Green

    Hey sweetie! I’m behind you! I can’t believe you’ve gotten this kind of reaction.. If someone doesn’t want to donate, fine, but to attack you for this? Unbelievable! Luv ya!

  • Echo Vetter

    Thank you for this post, Ashley! Chaz and I feel called to adoption as well. For many years it has felt like a “someday” calling but lately it feels like a “today” calling! So we have made some big changes to create room in our budget for more savings and we’ve started talking about/wrestling with the idea of fundraising. I appreciate your perspective on the idea. You are in my prayers as you begin this journey!!

  • bosssanders

    Stephanie – thank you! Love ya!

    Echo – How exciting! I can’t wait to hear more! I will be the first to admit that fundraising is hard for me on this side. (Simply, my hang-ups) On the flip-side, though, I have been so blessed to be allowed to be a part of others’ stories. When it comes to other people…I’m learning that it really doesn’t matter what you do – people tend to have an opinion.

  • kimmie

    We once on Mother ‘s Day (Which fell on a Sunday that year) had an usher at church hand us an envelope w a wrapped small gift box.

    I thought it was a thank you for something my husband did for someone…so I kept worshipping and carried it out to the car. Upon my Knight driving home I opened the card…in it was a bank check for $10,000…unsigned. it was encouraging us to trust God on an adoption that was having many twists and turns. To this day we don’t know who it was…but what encouragement it brought and still does.

    God owns the cattle on a thousand hills…follow Him!

    mama to 8
    One homemade and 7 adopted

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