There’s one thing we all have in common, it seems - despite our nationality or backgrounds, despite our religious or political affiliations and despite the amount of money in our pocket: Happiness, or the pursuit of it. We all want it. Very few of us are where we want to be.
As teenagers, most of us were taught that there’s a natural succession of events that are supposed to take place:
You graduate highschool.
Go to college.
Get a job.
Find a spouse to spend the rest of your life with.
Buy a beautiful house with a white picket fence, or now - something with 3,000 + square feet, fence optional.
Have 1-3 kids.
Work 9-5 every day.
Go into a crazy amount of debt.
Maybe retire.
Teach your children to do the same.
My husband and I decided we’d skip a few steps, thinking we could move on to the rest of the “Plan” a little quicker - instead, we accidentally jumped off the train, altogether.
Turns out, that ACCIDENT might’ve been one of the smartest things we’ve done.
After some time (okay, lots of time) to think about it, the previous plan just doesn’t make sense. Why work your butt off just to spend so much money so that you HAVE to work? Sure, some people love their jobs and love working, but do you really like HAVING to work? Do you love the thought each morning that if you decided you would rather do something else, move…that you couldn’t, because you had too many bills to pay - like that big screen tv you just installed over your hot tub?
And, for some reason, we’ve gotten into this mindset that BIGGER is better. So, our houses need to be HUGE with state of the art impressive gadgetry…but, for what? So we can work hard during the day and have almost no time to enjoy it? And, is vegging out in front of the tv after a long, hard day at work really enjoying those things?
Does that make us happy?
How far does a good job, big house, big toys, lots of money and college degree go when it comes to happiness? (If you have the answer, please let me know)
Does BIGGER really mean better? Is MORE really MORE, or is it LESS?
Can we even be happy for more than just a while? Is it possible? And if it is, would we allow ourselves that luxury?
What does it even mean to be happy? How do we get there?
I’m ready to find out.
Ashley’s on a mission.
Welcome back!
December 22nd, 2009 at 5:11 pm
I’m certainly finding that I am happier with each ‘thing’ that I give away. I am also saddest the day after Christmas when I realize all this new ’stuff’ needs a new home somewhere in our small space. Then I think of the people who bought it and how they needed their money more than I needed a new gadget…it goes on even more than all that but this cheery comment is long enough.
OBVIOUSLY, gifts are not my love language. ( ;
December 23rd, 2009 at 4:57 pm
I was watching an interview with Mary J. Blige on one of the morning shows yesterday. She was discussing how something terrible happened to her in her childhood and she battled with depression for a long time. And while yes, she has reached success, and she has a lot of really nice things, that doesn’t fix the depression. The depression takes constant work and the rest is just “stuff.” I’ve always been pretty big on trying to keep things simple. “Stuff” is just “stuff” and it’s replaceable as well as forgettable. Sure, there are a lot of things would be nice to have, but in the end it isn’t going to make me or anyone else happier. It’s just one more thing to have to worry about. Pool= maintenance, chemicals, closing up for the winter, filling up in the spring. Big house= more floors to mop and sweep and vacuum, more ledges to dust, more space for more “stuff” that might get touched once a year. You’re on the right track Ash.