Reading:

A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini – I borrowed this one from the library last Friday and am really liking it.  It’s set in the Middle East and I keep finding myself wanting to find a quiet corner to sit and read more of it – although, there was a bit of a lull in part two (but I’m past that part, now).

Esther: It’s Tough Being A Woman Study by Beth Moore

Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver – started this one a while back and just now getting back to it.  My brother bought it for me for my birthday last year, and I decided to finish reading it closer to garden planning season (which is now)   It’s a GREAT read, especially if you are interested in gardening or even just learning about what’s in the food you are eating NOW – even if you THINK you’re eating healthy.

Projects:

-Making a quilt.  This could quite possibly be my “current project” for the next 10 years if I’m not careful.  I feel like I need to hurry up and finish it before I bag the pieces to be procrastinated about.  I’m bad about half-finished craft projects.

-Washing and drying some clothes from mom’s closet to be taken to a consignment shop.  They were clean, technically – but, washing and drying seemed SO much easier and less time consuming than ironing each button down top.  I HATE ironing button downs.  Hate, as in I don’t do it.  Thank goodness for dryers and wet wash cloths (and the lack of many button downs in my own closet).

Observations:

-Uh oh.  Mom and dad have television (well, programming) and Lorelei has become quite obsessed.  Oops.  I swore I wouldn’t be one of those parents, but it’s kind of hard to resist when it’s there and when it’s pretty much always on unless she and I are alone.  Things will change soon enough, I guess.  Kind of a blessing in disguise that our television at home is no longer hooked up to a service – it’s a lot easier to find “quiet time” and “together time” and “play/explore” time when TV isn’t an option (besides, the best shows are online, anyhow).

-I’m pretty sure my almost-two year old isn’t the only one testing me.  Seems like other people like to “test” me too – especially when it comes to her.  BAH

Questions:

-How do you walk the fine line between being content and gracious with what you have and seeking to be all that you can be?

-Is it normal for 1 year olds to cry out some during the night if they never fully wake up and act fine once they do?

-Why does everyone want to put Lorelei’s mullet into a ponytail, which would look like a rat tail?

Things I Find Overwhelming:

-the huge amount of doctors’ and hospital bills STILL coming in.

Welcome back!

I *accidentally* kind of went off my prenatal vitamins again.  Actually, I just forgot for a day or two and noticed that my heartburn went away, as well.  So, I thought I’d do an experiment and see if I left out the vitamins a couple of days, if the heartburn would stay gone.  And, it did.  So, I’m wondering if that’s the connection.  Then again, I took the vitamins again today and have done pretty well, so who knows.  I’ve decided to only take them in the morning with just a bit on my stomach and with water only (no juice at all).

The area around my butt-bone (as I like to call it since I have no other words to describe it) has definitely felt awkward.  Kind of like I need a chiropractic adjustment (which is awesome since we can’t go to the chiropractor due to insurance and such).  And, of course, still having the moments where it’s like a stitch and I can’t walk without being in HUGE pain.  I have to lay down and just let it pass with a pillow between my knees (and on my left side) – that usually works, although it means I’m not moving for at LEAST 30 minutes, if not longer.

I’m eating well and having no problems there.  This second trimester is supposed to be the “honeymoon phase” and I’m feeling very jipped since I JUST started feeling okay and now comes the heartburn, cramps, and overall PAIN.  AWESOME.

The past few days, I’ve noticed an increase of hormone induced FREAK OUTS.  Granted, I have loads of reasons to be in a less than happy state, but the past 3 days have been RIDICULOUS.  You know, wanting to cry and not knowing why and a mean word just makes me burst into tears and such.

And because FREAK OUTS just aren’t enough, for the past couple of days I’ve had some major back pain.  Not the achey joints and ithinkipulledsomething sort of kind…but, the kind that feels oddly similar to back labor.  Yesterday, it would come and go but stay for 3 hours or so at a time.  I called the hospital’s OB line to find out what I could do and any things to watch for and they basically said:

-get on all fours to help the baby have more room and get her off your back

-lay on your left side with pillows between your legs and add some ICE

-take some tylenol or tylenol PM if you need it

-warm shower

-no pushing/pulling/picking up things.  You know, like YOUR KID.  Right right.

-And, if it becomes intermittent GET IN HERE!

So, I’ve been watching them a bit.  Not with pen and paper and charts kind of way, but just paying more attention to how often and how long – but no official stop watch yet.  Today, they’ve been coming and going more.  At one point, it’d actually last 30 minutes and then go away for a while and come back again.  Plus, I just feel WEIRD.  Not like when I’m about to get sick and I feel like I’ve been hit by an invisible bus, but WEIRD and tired all the same.  Lying down doesn’t really help except for the OTHER pains – and these “pains” are enough to keep me awake or wake me up but nothing to scream and bang my head about.  Also, nothing to run to the hospital about since I know that’ll end up in more bills that I can’t pay.  So, I’ll just wait.

Did I mention I’m only 25 weeks?

The thought of going into early labor – this early – kind of freaks me out, but then again it’s not hard to freak me out right now and I’m trying to keep that in mind.  I really can’t afford to just run to the doctor these days JUST BECAUSE – especially not the hospital.  Then again, the thoughts of what if I wait too late …yeh.  *Sigh*  Apparently I am now experiencing pregnancy induced anxiety.  Woot.

Oh, and just for the sake of chronicling things a bit better (I’m feeling really badly that I don’t have an actual journal dedicated to this pregnancy like I did with L), I had some major crampage earlier.  You know, the remember to breathe sort where you clench your eyes and everything kind of becomes hard to concentrate on and the text on your laptop gets blurry?  Yeh.  That kind.  No contractions, just major OWW – and then it went away.

Okay.  Cramps.  Again.

And, I’m out.

There’s been a lot of talk about babies lately with a new addition coming soon, and Lorelei going through her “baby” phase.

“Baby! Baby!” she shouts excitedly every time a baby or child under the age of 12 walks by. We’ve tried pointing out the difference between baby and kid, but I’m pretty sure she just doesn’t care.

We’ve also been trying to introduce the idea that there is a baby in mommy’s tummy – and, the results of that are pretty much up in the air as she now points to my belly button and exclaims “Baby!” She does seem to understand that “Baby” isn’t just a new word for tummy since Mimi, Daddy, and Gramps lack babies but I really think she thinks my new outtie belly button is part of the baby.

Yesterday:

Me:  Lorelei, did you know mommy has your baby sister, Aurora, in her tummy?

Lorelei:  (Looks up from the magazine she’s looking through and eyes me carefully)

Me:  (points to tummy) Baby Aurora is in mommy’s tummy!

Lorelei: (lunches over the magazine and pulls the cover off my tummy, and then lifts my shirt up.  She looks at me and frowns and slides her hands under my butt as if trying to lift me up.)

Apparently she thought I was sitting on the baby and needed to get off.

Once again, no pictures.

I swear, I’ll do better.  Besides, I suck at keeping lasagna noodles all pretty and unbroken.  Luckily, they taste the same.

This recipe is for Spinach Lasagna and my father – the “slap on 80 lbs of beef and we’ll call it a day” guy – even gave it 4 1/2 stars.  It’s missing 1/2 a star because obviously it has no meat.  And, because he likes to complain.  (He helped himself to 3 servings, though.)

Spinach Lasagna

Ingredients:

2 T. olive oil, divided
1 medium onion, finely chopped (which I omitted.  I hate onions.  Like the plague.)
1/2 t. crushed red pepper flakes
1 clove of garlic, minced (Use 1 clove if you want it to blend seamlessly into the recipe.  You can use three if you’re going vampire hunting later.)
1/2 lb. fresh mushrooms, chopped
1 – 8 oz can of tomato sauce
1 – 28 oz. can whole tomatoes, including liquid
1 – 6 oz. can tomato paste
1 t. salt
1 t. oregano
1/2 t. basil
1/2 cup red cooking wine
1 egg
1 -10 oz package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and well drained
1 cup ricotta cheese
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
8 oz. lasagna noodles, cooked and drained
1 lb. mozzarella cheese, grated

Yields: 6-8 servings.  Or, 4 if people pretend they don’t like it and keep going back for more.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees…

In a large saute pan, heat 1 T of oil.  Saute onion, red pepper flakes, and garlic.

Add mushrooms and saute gently.  Stir in tomato sauce, canned tomatoes with liquid, tomato paste, salt, oregano, basil, and wine.

Simmer about 15 minutes, breaking tomatoes into small pieces as it cooks.

In a medium bowl, mix egg with spinach, ricotta cheese, Parmesan cheese, and remaining 1 T oil.

Using a 9×13 baking dish, pour in half of the sauce.  Cover with about half of the noodles, or however much you can fit.  Spread entire spinach mixture over noodles.  Sprinkle with half of mozz cheese and repeat with leftover noodles, sauce, and then cheese.

Shove it (carefully) into the oven and bake at 350 for 30-45 minutes.

For extra yumminess, pair it with some garlic/cheese/buttered toast.

**Of course, for all of you meat heads, you can most definitely add meat.
***Just don’t mess with the sauce…because it is DIVINE.

(PS – Thanks Nis for the heads up!)

I just finished uploading a photo and ordering a box of 6 Valentines. Usually…we don’t really send these out, but I couldn’t help myself. These are cute!
And, they’re free. Like, REAL free. Even the shipping is covered.

Check it out:  https://stories.scrapbooksetc.com/shop/cards/valentines/

Use the coupon code (at checkout): VALENTINE

This probably won’t last long so HURRY!

Looking around, it seems like everything is calm – the air is still and nothing moves.

Except my heart.  It beats furiously, knowing there is something more.

Is it frustration over the events that have transpired today?

Is it the disappointment in having had so much placed on one event, and that certain event left me feeling perhaps more lost and displaced than when I began?

Is it the fact that I can’t find my footing no matter where I step?  I want nothing more than to belong somewhere, but this place seems to have forgotten me and grown up around where I was, stretching and reluctant.

Is it the overwhelming expectation to fulfill roles that I cannot completely carry out in this little corner?

Or, perhaps it’s the sickening vibration of intuition that has settled in the pit of my stomach, vibrating throughout my body.

Perhaps it’s not a matter of what has happened, but a matter of what’s to come.

[Right here is where there should be a scrumptious photograph of a yummy brownie, but I ate it before my brain even thought about the camera.  Oops.  Will a picture of my thighs suffice, instead?]

I’ve been experimenting with some new recipes lately, although most of them have been “real food” – you know, the main course types.

But, then there were these chocolate chip cookie dough brownies.

If I wouldn’t have already eaten them, I’d take a photograph…but then you’d drool all over your keyboard.  I promise.  They were good.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1box Betty Crocker Original Supreme brownie mix (it comes with chocolate icing, but you can save that for another time)
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup water
3 eggs (2 for the brownie mix, 1 for the cookie mix)
1 pouch (1 lb 1.5 oz) Betty Crocker chocolate chip cookie mix
1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened
chopped pecans (optional – just add these into the batters)

(Basically, you just buy the cookie and brownie mix and prepare each separately according to the directions on the back.)

Heat oven to 350 F and grease bottom of a 13×9 pan.  Prepare brownie mix and spread it evenly.  Next, prepare the chocolate chip cookie dough and then spoon drop it in.  Personally, I dropped mine in so it took on a checkerboard effect, but you could do it any way you please.

Bake 35-40 minutes.

Let cool completely.

Now, if you wanted, you could drizzle it in caramel and chocolate, slop on some ice cream and call it a day.

Or, you could REALLY let it cool completely and then prepare the chocolate ganache and smother your brownie in that.  –Which, I recommend.

Actually, I recommend spooning out some of the warm brownie and adding ice cream WHILE I let the rest cool (are you seeing now why perhaps there are no photographs?)

To make the chocolate ganache:

1 bag (12 oz.) semi-sweet chocolate chips
3/4 cup heavy whipping cream
6 Tbsp butter at room temp

In a small saucepan, heat the cream and butter – You’ll want it to ALMOST be a boil, but not quite.  Then, pour in your chocolate chips and stir until smooth and melted.

Then, smother your brownies in it and try not to eat the whole pan.  At least, not all of them at once.  Space it out a little.  You know, half the pan now and the other half in the morning.

Of course, you’re *supposed* to let the ganache set – which takes a while – but, it’s tasty either way.  I just have no patience, is all.  OBVIOUSLY.

BEFORE:

AFTER KABOOST:

The kaboost is one of our new favorite things, it’s AWESOME. If you don’t know what it is, it’s this little thing that goes on the bottom of your chairs and is completely adjustable for pretty much any chair legs. It’s very sturdy and boosts your child up so they can sit at the dinner table with you!! Plus, it makes the space smaller between them and the table so there’s less chance of falling and sliding! Lorelei loves it too since it means she gets to craft and eat WITH us instead of watching us have almost separate meals since the highchair we have doesn’t really fit at the table so well.

Do you see that little hook-looking-thing? Well, it’s called the FUMI. Basically, it’s a purse hook disguised as jewelry – or, is that jewelry disguised as a purse hook? Anyhow, it opens up to balance easily on a table and extends a small hook which you can hang your purse on. The Fumi is pretty great for keeping your purse off the floor and in your line of vision (but out of the way), but it’s also great for those bathroom stalls that always seem to pick me with NO COAT HOOKS! I hate trying to juggle a coat and my purse while I’m in a tiny stall, and refuse to sit my purse on the nasty floor. My solution: the fumi!

Love them! (Links will tell you more about the products…)

You know how much I *LOVE* lists, so here we go…a stolen ABC meme

(A.) Attached or single? Attached.
(B.) Best friend? My husband and my mom probably know me the BEST, even where I can say nothing at all and they just know somethings. But, I have a lot of other awesome people in my life, too – including some online friends that I think God placed randomly around the world just so I could have excuses for mandatory vacations (because we are SO meeting) and then, some older AND newer friends. I look forward to seeing the new relationships fold out!
(C.) Cake or pie? Cake. Most definitely. I like that there’s more to it. Dessert is one of my FAVORITE things if done “right”.
(D.) Day of choice? Depends on the week. I’m loving Sundays lately, but today has lots of promise too…I’m going to get a massage! And, Wednesday has me anxious-excited, too…
(E.) Essential item? Clean panties ranks on up there for me. I also take my essential oils when we go places though, never know when you’ll get sick and what not. And, my cell phone is kind of important although I HATE talking on the phone. Oh. My laptop.
(F.) Favorite Colors – ocean blues and greens, lavendar/light purple, and raspberry pink
(G.) Gummy bears or worms? Worms…but not just the gummy ones…the ones that are gummy AND crusted in sugar. Obviously.
(H.) Hometown? Kentucky. Yee haw.
(I. ) Indulgence? Right now? Maybe the cinnamon rolls I’m CONSIDERING baking haha. Later? The prenatal massage. Usually? warm pjs and comfort food and my blog and L!!
(J.) January or July? January – July
(K.) Kids? 2. Sort of. I have a toddler (Lorelei) and this child who likes to kick my insides with the expected arrival in May
(L.) Life isn’t complete without? Love
(M.) Marriage date? May 20
(N.) Number of brothers & sisters? One brother
(O.) Oranges or apples? Oranges. Apples are okay, but mostly only if they’re baked and covered with sugar and cinnamon.
(P.) Phobias? Heights. I won’t climb trees unless you really bribe me and I definitely won’t jump from big heights. No way. Is that a phobia or does it just make me smarter?
(Q.) Quotes? “I’m seven, but people think I look much older.” and “You’re not the boss of me.”
(R.) Reasons to smile? My daughters and my family. Blogging. Yummy food. Everyday miracles. Faith. Knowing that I don’t have to know it all because I’m not the one ultimately in charge – which gets me off the hook.
(S.) Season of choice? Spring and Summer. But, I love Christmas. I love how Spring feels like it’s all full of NEW LIFE and the first days of beautiful weather (but hate the tornadoes). I love summer, too…
(T.) Tag seven peeps! Okay. You’re it. Or you’re not. You pick.
(U.) Unknown fact about me? Ummm…that depends on how often and deep you’ve read this blog. Because I’ve mostly told anything you could want to know. How about…I own a 1940s Waterfall Dining set and at this point, I’d be SO happy with a trade for a “cheaper” but stylish (my style) set that I don’t have to worry about messing up. I don’t want to have to use table covers and coasters – I want to sit down and let L fingerpaint and NOT CARE when she goes off the paper and not CARE if a visitor sets a heavy box on the table. Unfortunately, antiques just make me nervous…like somebody was so careful to keep it pretty for so long and now *I* am going to screw it up. Anyone want to trade me? I’m. So. Serious. It’s a beautiful set…it just makes me all nervous and such.
(V.) Vegetable? Sugar Snap Pea (pods). And…tomatoes…and steamed veggies with goat cheese crumbles on them and MMM. I like cooked veggies…except onions. Onions make me sick. Not sick enough to die but sick enough to really not like the person who ignored my “no onions please!”
(W.) Worst habits? shutting people out. I trust fairly quickly but once you burn me, I tend to kind of shut people out. Which is bad considering nobody is perfect all the time. (Esp not me).
(X.) X-ray or ultrasound? I’ve had both but prefer Ultrasounds I guess. Is that what they’re asking? Xrays have always meant something was wrong and ultrasounds for me have MOSTLY meant I was pregnant. Plus, ultrasounds are way quicker.
(Y.) Your favorite food? Chicken a la king right now over biscuits. Or…frisco melt from steak and shake. Or…oooh. I’ve been craving Red Lobster’s lobster and shrimp (anywhere actually, but Red lobster is cheaper than the fancy restaurant downtown)…of course, it’s way out of my price range. They forgot to add the dollar menu. Gaw. (I really would not eat lobster off a dollar menu, I promise)
(Z.) Zodiac sign? Virgo. And, that’s about as much as I know about that. I don’t follow the zodiac stuff so much. Unless it’s the funny ones where they tell you you’ll be impaled by a stick on your way to work and such. Those are funny.