(continued from this post)

My doctor had a strong feeling about what was ailing me; what was holding up a potential pregnancy. I wasn’t ovulating. She sent me to Walgreens to buy a few Ovulation Predictor Kits, to confirm her suspicions.  I walked through the aisles, trying to find some hint of where I’d find an OPK – and finally, I spotted them – write next to the pregnancy tests, laughing in my face.  I tucked the OPK under my arm and walked, head down to the counter, sliding it across.  I shuffled through my purse, my face red.  I wondered if they all knew that I was “infertile” just by looking at me.

Another cycle came and went, and I was mostly drained. It felt like we were going nowhere fast – over 14 months of trying, and still no pregnancy. What was wrong with me? What kind of a wife was I? Would I ever be a mother? These questions and more zoomed through my brain. I felt defeated, damaged.

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