As I sit in my darkened room, I realize that many of you may be waiting on some sort of an update. I’ve received a few emails voicing concern, and so many very wonderful messages filled with support and hope. Thank you. While I can’t say that everything is “okay,” I can say that nothing is worse. For the past few days, I’ve been dealing with some sleep issues (or, the inability to). It simply began with the inability to fall asleep – regardless of how tired I was. My mind would be blank, and yet all I could do was stare at the inside of my eyelids, hoping for a visit from the Sandman. Hours later, after drifting in and out of sleep and tossing and turning, I would give up and log onto the internet, where I’d dink around until my brain began to shut down on it’s own. Then, near morning, I’d log off and try to catch a few Z’s before the hubs and baby woke up. Naps weren’t working either; My body was so physically tired, but my brain? It wanted to stay in the “on” mode. A side effect of the new medicine? Perhaps. Although, it could’ve been many things.

Yesterday, my Grams came up to visit, and we enjoyed a great lunch at my favorite restaurant and a little perusing through some cutesy shops downtown. We talked alot and I had a great time. I love being able to spend time with her. And, when she dropped L and I off at the house, I thought for sure I’d be able to just collapse on the bed and drift straight into sleep. Nope. Nada.

Then, my wonderful in-laws invited us to supper – where I kept almost falling asleep at the picnic table. I felt awful – like I was being rude – but my brain was trying to shut down. I’m thinking that this brain of mine really does need a serious talk from me, my body. You see brain, I really need to be awake in order to do things like eat, drive, walk, socialize and take care of my kid. However, there are lots of opportunities for you to shut down – you know, when I lay down and get all comfy on that soft bed? That’s your cue. So, from now on, could you just cooperate? Pretty please? Because, just so you know…if you don’t, I have nothing against popping out the big guns and forcing you to sleep. I will do it. Don’t mess with me.

By the end of supper, my FIL offered to let me borrow some of his over the counter store brand sleeping pills they’d picked up. He swore by them, so I took a few home to try later (not to all be taken at once, mind you). And, last night before bed, I took one. I slept. Through the night. Until 9 AM. I think I still have some more “catching up” to do, but that was a great start. And, if this was a placebo effect or anything, please nobody burst my bubble – because, quite frankly, I’m happy with this whole being able to sleep thing. I don’t really care HOW it happened. I’m hoping that the cycle of sleeplessness has been broken, and perhaps tonight I can sleep again. Through the night.

Welcome back!