Oh…where to start?

Last night, I suddenly realized that I had an appointment marked down in 2 of my calendars (the one I carry in my purse and the one on my laptop), both were for the same appointment – just, different days. Go Ashley. Sunday night, everything is closed. Go Ashley. So, I wake up this morning WAY TOO EARLY and call as soon as they open (and they didn’t open on time). I found out the appointment was for today. What the heck – I scheduled an appointment for Monday? So, I roll out of bed…very very slowly…and sludge off to the bathroom to stand under the steaming hot downpour to take a shower.

The appointment was to see a therapist. Nah, I didn’t go off my rocker – there are just a few things that need working on in my life (who doesn’t have those?) And, I wanted an “expert’s ” opinion – preferably BEFORE I made any choices for the HUGE decisions that are now sitting in front of me, and figuring out “where to go from here” from this hand I’ve been dealt.

So, I went. Today.

And, it sucked. Bad.

Seriously, if I wanted to sit and talk to someone as they do nothing but take notes and nod, I’d have set up some stuffed animals. I mean, if all I want is to vent…I can scream into my pillow, use my art (or any other outlet), I can blog, or call any of my wonderful and great friends. What I WANTED was an expert to put my options in perspective for me and give me the usual “homework”. That’s what is SUPPOSED to happen. I’ve only had a few years of college in the subject, but even I KNOW this. GAW.

So, I talked. She listened. That’s ALL she did. I tried digging and I ended up feeling more like the therapist, but all she’d give me was open ended answers. “I can’t tell you that” and “The answer lies within”. Well you know what? BULL SHIT lady. Lucky for me, I didn’t pay $100/hr. I’m still short of the cash I did have to pay…and that’s a good 45 minutes I’ll never get back of my life (supposed to be an hour, but you can only listen to a talking magic 8 ball for so long).

She decided I don’t need any more “treatments.” Praise the Lord, I’m healed! I needed guidance. I received….silence…and a bill. Spiffy.

Afterwards, my lovely husband meets me to eat at one of my favorite restaurants (it’s only one of my faves because it actually has something non-greasy on the menu. You know…vegetables…without butter and tons of salt.) So, we eat and then we end up back at my SUV.

Time to say goodbye.

But, he wants me to come to his office with Baby L. Okay. Fine.

He tends to cut all over the place on roads I’m not very familiar with. So, I remind him as we leave “Make sure I can follow.”

He nods.

That’s about the last I see of him.

I manage to stay behind him for a few minutes. Then, he starts taking turns that if I were to follow him, it’d mean playing chicken with vehicles about 3x my SUVs size. I look back and the baby’s sleeping. Shit. Can’t wake her up. Guess I’ll wait.

Then, he’s gone.

Wonderful. I’m not in a good area of town. And, I’m not positive which way to go. If I turn the wrong way, I could meet some more “jiggas”… You know, the thugs. Last time I was in this part of town, I made the mistake of asking for directions…and a dude tried getting into my car. Lucky for him, he didn’t. He almost rode on my window back to town…but he decided to let go of my door. Lucky bastard.

So, by following nothing but intuition, I figure it out. Daddy would be so proud. I found his work. And, I drove right past. Should’ve waited for me butthead, Ashley’s NOT having a good day.

Now, I’m gonna crawl into bed and sleep (maybe, if it’s okay with Lorelei. If not, I guess I’ll do whatever she says.).

Welcome back!